A mother’s love grows in the letting go...
- Shana Farr
- May 9
- 2 min read
By Shana Farr
What do you do when your 10-year-old son leaves for five whole days to play in a chess tournament in Florida… without you?
You breathe.
You tuck little handwritten notes into his suitcase—one for each morning, so he feels your love and encouragement no matter how far away he is.
You let the tears fall while the Uber ride pulls away, thankful that he took a moment to turn and wave goodbye with excitement and nerves as he embarks on this journey.
Then, you pull yourself together and get ready for a kid-free weekend with your hubby and friends—a whirlwind of mixed emotions: pride, longing, joy, maybe a little freedom, and relieved that nowadays we have video chat!
That moment reminded me of a stanza in the promise I made to myself as a new mom—and it is a hard one:
I promise...
To let you spread your wings and fly,
although I’ll want you near.
I promise not to hold you back
because of my own fear.
Every parent knows this feeling. We experience it again and again—first days of school, sleepovers, camp, trips without us. It never really gets easier, but a mother’s love only grows in the letting go.
Honestly, I think my own mom still feels it as a grammie. Every summer, we all descend on her and Dad, filling the house with noise, laughter, and love—and then we leave. I’m sure Mom is ready for the calm, but even in her exhaustion, I know the goodbye still tugs at her heart—just as the first time she felt it.
Well, even though he won’t be with me on Mother’s Day (let’s face it… every day is Mother’s Day) he did leave me a little Mother’s Day gift to open on Sunday—with a little help from Daddy, of course.
My little knight may be capturing queens and kings this weekend, but he’s already captured this mama’s heart.
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